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“You guys do a lot of quizzing together?” Ed asks.
“We compete in a pub quiz league. North West champions, last year.” Lucius boasts. “What about you guys?”
“Done bits, here and there. Izzy got to the final of University Challenge, back in, what, 1988? I won a bit of cash on The Chase a few years ago, and Fang is a Mastermind champion.”
Ah, shit. They are going to get demolished.
*
Or: Stede and Ed are captains of rival teams on the TV quiz show Only Connect, and then cuteness ensues.
Stede Bonnet's love life is completely non-existent and an utter tragedy to behold - At least, according to those closest in his life.
Thus they're compelled to do what any group comprised of an ex-wife, co-workers turned friends through sheer proximity, and assorted significant others of aforementioned co-workers turned friends would do: Set up five blind dates that Stede Bonnet has no choice but to go on.
Stede keeps on showing up ridiculously early to these dates, but at least the bartender is friendly.
Stede sits down to read his nightly bedtime story to the crew of the Revenge, only to discover that Lucius has saddled him with a particularly trashy novel in which a gentleman and a pirate begin a hot and heavy romance. Ed has been on board for several weeks, and everyone is sick of the slow burn and apparently ready to shove them down the path to a real romance by whatever means they can.
As Stede reads (and tries to work out who the author of the story might be), they'll bicker their way through romance tropes, story structures, and what it means to have a happy ending. And if by the end of this night Edward Teach isn't in Stede Bonnet's bed, Lucius will probably have to eat his match-making hat...
Edward Teach is a writer from Toronto who decides to go to his family cabin in Cape Breton, Nova Scotia one September. As he's settling in for a retreat away from city life, a massive storm rolls in that turns into a hurricane that is far stronger than predicted. Everyone else in the surrounding area has fled into town, but Ed decides to stick it out.
As the storm begins to gain strength, he hears a desperate knock on his door. A very wet and very grateful Stede Bonnet, who was at the glamping dome in a neighbouring property, joins him in the cabin as the storm intensifies.
It's the first Christmas since Stede Bonnet's divorce. His kids are with their mother, and with nowhere else to go, he decides to go down south to the Dominican Republic for two weeks over Christmas and New Year's. There, he meets Ed, who is his neighbour and is also there by himself. Both men are dealing with loneliness and drama in their personal lives, but find comfort in one another.
“This is Mary?” Ed asks Handsome. What did she call him? Stede? “As in… The Mary?”
Both of them stare at him. Mary, with confusion. Stede, with bewilderment.
“Yes, um…” Stede hesitates. “The Mary. My ex-wife.”
Ed chuckles. “Well, that’s awkward. Not exactly the way you want to meet your boyfriend’s ex, is it?”
-
Modern AU where Ed and Stede meet on a 14-hour flight and immediately end up fake dating, because of course they do.
In which Stede spots a pretty guy across the bar and ends up discovering more about himself than he ever expected to.
In which Stede, upon being told he was supposed to marry Mary, decided to give up his wealth and privilege and dedicate his life to the service of god.
Or: The story of how Edward Teach fell in love with a priest.
Caught in the whirlwind of a year-long renovation, Ed and Stede are on the brink of unveiling their new inn. With the finishing touches underway, a menacing storm brews on the horizon. While battening down the hatches, they're interrupted by two posh stragglers seeking refuge. However these stragglers aren't just any guests, they're familiar faces. As the storm rages outside, new connections are forged within.
Or
Due to a particularly nasty storm, Mary and Doug must stay the night at the Unicorn Inn, unaware of just who exactly is running it.
“MARY?!”, Ed’s partner yelled in return.
Mary, he had said.
Ed’s entire body froze on the spot, and he felt ill, and he couldn't turn around, he couldn't look, but at the same time, he needed to know. He tried to turn to them, but it's like he had been crucified to the wall.
“Oh my God! Stede!”, the woman said loudly – happily. She was happy to see him. Oh no. No no.
OR
Mary and Doug accidently end up on Ed and Stede's inn, and now Ed has to deal with that :) because I enjoy putting them in situations.