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Thorin temporarily settles in the Shire to work as a blacksmith. There he meets Bilbo, a middle-aged bachelor who insists on over-paying (“tipping,” according to the insufferable halfling) for his work.
Throughout the quest to reclaim Erebor, Bilbo learned to deal with the many vexing behaviours of the Dwarves. One thing he could never adapt to, however, was their belief in superstition.
Belladonna, on her way to the Iron Hills, dies in childbirth after finding shelter in a destroyed and abandoned Erebor. Her newborn son, Bilbo, is left in the Mountain, raised by Smaug. When Thorin and his Company come to reclaim their home, they’re surprised to find a Hobbit within its walls.
Bilbo tries to be romantic, but he needs a little help from his friends.
Hobbits didn’t have such things as courting rituals – they were uncomplicated folk. They announced their affections with flowers or a cooked meal, a shared pipe or simply a kiss – and then there were meetings with both families and a date set for the wedding. Dwarves, as he kept discovering, were a completely different kettle of fish.
'Alone this Yuletide? Irritated with prying and nosey family members? I am an out of work blacksmith currently trying to make my way by any means necessary that does not involve my resorting to thievery (prisons are most uncomfortable, I've unfortunate first hand experience). However, if you would like me to be your strictly platonic companion for any social function, but have me pretend that we are in a serious courtship, so as to torment your family and ward off unwanted suitors then I am more than obliging...' After becoming increasingly irritated by overtures of romance from various Shire residents following the death of his mother four years ago, Bilbo is more than ready to resort to desperate measures. That is, up to and including pretending to be in a serious relationship with a certain surly blacksmith currently inhabiting the Bindbale Woods. It's a good idea after all; all they have to do is pretend to be in love over the Yuletide period and Bilbo's family and suitors will surely leave him alone after that. It's perfect! And nothing can possibly go wrong, right? Certainly nothing as preposterous as falling for one another for real...
Take a dragon and get rid of it, take a Kingdom under the Mountain and let it thrive under Thráin’s rule, take the King’s eldest son - as proud and arrogant as you can picture him - and then send him to the Shire in order to refine his diplomatic skills. Or, as his sister puts it: to grow them at last. Now, throw in the Master of Bag End playing host for the dwarf prince: you’ll get a clash of cultures, an ill-advised bet about educating a certain hobbit in the dwarf-lore, and all the pride and prejudice business you could hope for, plus Khuzdul. A retelling inspired by My Fair Lady.
In which a perfectly normal hobbit wedding is interrupted by the rather unexpected arrival of a royal visitor.
Bilbo never bothers denying that he is a slight, little bit, probably infatuated with Thorin. It’s not something that bothers him. Really. He’s pretty sure that everyone very likely has a little flutter in their chest for the dwarf. He’s something grand and unattainable. And it’s really much safer if it stays that way.
The burglar didn't know what he was doing, and Thorin wasn't going to be the one to tell him.